Week 06 Strong Superstructure

            Wisely President Gordon B. Hinckley taught, “You can’t build a great building on a weak foundation. You must have a solid foundation if you’re going to have a strong superstructure."  One quality my husband has said he loves about me is I want more for our marriage, I will not settle!

I want a mad love affair!

I want a great romance!

I want indescribable joy and happiness!

And the newest to add to the list:

I want a strong superstructure! 

            Because I was raised in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, when you say foundation, I say Jesus Christ. There is no question, the Savior and his teachings are the solid foundation. Mosiah 14:24-15 teach, “Therefore, whoso heareth these sayings of mine and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man, who built his house upon a rock— And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell not, for it was founded upon a rock.” 

            Once we are strive to have the Savior, his teachings, and his gospel apart of our marriage foundation. What else should we do? Build Love Maps!  A Love Map is a term used by John M. Gottman PH.D, the country’s foremost relationship expert. Love Map is the term “for the part of your brain where you store all the relevant information about your partners life.” (Gottman, 54)

 How much do you really know about your spouse?

What kind of dressing would he order on a salad? What is his favorite show? What are his life’s dreams? What are my husbands health concerns?

           Why is having all this knowledge of my spouse’s life important? “From knowledge springs not only love but the fortitude to weather martial storms. Couples who have detailed love maps of each others worlds are far better prepared to cope with stressful events and conflict.” (Gottman, 54)

We were never promised that in our marriage there would only be happiness. We are promised the storms will come, the rain will fall, the temptations will be present, we will have hard times, and sometimes it may seem unbearable.  We must have a solid foundation of our Savior Jesus Christ, and  we must draw near to each other to keep us from collapsing. 

          “The more you know and understand about each other, the easier it is to keep connected as life swirls around you.” (Gottman, 56)

Gottman, J. M., & Silver, N. (1999). The seven principles for making marriage work. New York: Crown.